February 2008 Archives
There is now a website that gives women a chance to make their breasts bigger free of charge...as long as the guys browsing the website decide to dontate to their cause.
Well, whatever floats your boat. I guess we'll just call this one neighborhood beautification! It's weird what people will spend their money on, especially horny-ass lonely males!
...don't you boy?"
If you're reading my posts, you'll see the one where one of my good friends mention Radiohead. Damn you Johnson, it made me go download "High and Dry", one of my favorite songs of all time. I used to listen to this Lord knows how many times in college.
Here's a video of a performance from 1995 in Holland. This is an amazing song, give it a listen.
I haven't laughed this hard in the long time. The funniest part of it for me is the very first of this video where he just slams the shit out of the podium, then off he goes.
I thought I got pissed off when things didn't go the way I want them to, but damn!
So a guy in Iowa works for a casino. For his year anniversary, they gave him a free night's stay and a gift certificate to stay in the casino.
Well, sounds like a hell of a deal. A lot more than some employers do for a year anniversay (I think I got a fake gold keychain for mine at Alltel and I thought that was alright). For this guy, it just wasn't enough. He wanted more. He wanted the hotel managers to help him hire a hooker.
When they would not give in to his demands, he tried the place next door. Management got tired of his requests so they went up to his room. He answered the door buck nekkid.
They fired him the next day. His excuse during a hearing in which he tried to get unemployment benefits? The commercials say it's just like Las Vegas so he thought he was in Vegas.
OK man, Iowa is a hell of a long ways away from Vegas. People from Nebraska shit on Iowa, that's how bad it really is.
His other excuse was that he was drunk and blamed it on the restaurant for getting him plowed. Goddamn people need to take responsibility for their own actions.
My question on this is, "How many of these jobs are entry-level, sales jobs?"
More than likely a good number. When businesses like these cut down on employees, they get rid of the peons who really need the job and who had absolutely no say in the day to day operations of the company. These people do not make any decisions and it is not their fault their company is going down the shitter.
How many upper-level salaries could be cut and/or gotten rid of entirely so that these people could have kept working?
When I worked for a cell phone provider, there were so many unnecessary positions there in upper management that it was not even funny. These people had no idea what in the hell was going on in the real world of the company and made some policies that were just mind-blowingly stupid.
I guess what I'm trying to say is get rid of the dipshits in upper management, re-train your salespeople, and things will improve.
Thank God I'm out of the cell phone business!!!!!!!!!!
Sean "Puffy" Combs may have more money than me. He may have more fans than me.
But you know what Puffy, I have one thing that you don't!
I DON'T THROW LIKE A DAMN GIRL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I saw this picture and immediately laughed my ass off. First of all, Puffy, you don't play catch in a sweater. Secondly, you are stepping into your throw with the wrong leg. While it's nice you are playing catch with your son, at least show him how to do it the right damn way.
Puffy, stick to bad music and living off of your one friend who actually had talent: Biggy.
...while I do envy you for your peaceful demeanor and kick-ass bacon (they do have a variety named just for your country-I always though it was ham though!), I have to wonder, silly Canadian, why you would get all shithoused on Moosehead, Labatte's Blue, or Molson Ice, then park in front of the police station.
Silly Canadian, I know you felt you deserved to be caught and that you were endangering lives. However, c'mon man, make it a little harder for the pigs to find you!!! You pay them to chase criminals, not have them come straight to the cop shop after a night at the sports bar watching hockey.
Oh silly Canadian...how silly you are indeed.
The Florida Marlins are looking for a few good men to become Manatees, their new cheerleading crew that will perform on Friday and Saturday games.
This men need to be overweight and also have the ability to "shake it like a polaroid picture". I can do both. Sign me up. I've always wanted to be mocked for my weight and be a novelty, freak-ass, sideshow. Hell, it's every tubby guy's dream.
Bet it would still be funny to watch tough.
I'm sorry for the strong language, but dammit Ralph...dammit.
Mr. Ralph Nader will again handicap the Democrats this election by running for president.
While I fully expect to landslide the Republicans come November, Nader will still take come votes away from the Dems, and God help him if he somehow costs us the election.
I wonder if the GOP hires this ass-clown to run for president. Remember Florida Ralph? Gore lost by under 600 votes to George W. Jackass and I'll bet some of your votes could have helped him. Think our country would be in such a mess if you hadn't ran back then?
Give it up man. You will not win and you are just hurting the wrong party by running.
Hillary, Hillary, Hillary...you are just starting to sound like a whiny little bitch now. First it was that Barack Obama was taking his speeches from other people. Now, she is all pissed off that he is putting some kind of "false info" in his mailing pieces.
Hillary says that he is falsely saying she thinks that NAFTA was a good idea or something like that.
Listen guys, it looks like Hillary is getting desperate. She has lost 11 straight primaries and desperately needs the next two (Ohio and Texas) to somehow stay in the race. Now she is crying about shit that does not need crying about. I like Hillary, I really do. I think she is a smart lady (I'm sure my Republican brother-in-law will vehemently disagree), but the tidal wave that is Obama is just too powerful right now.
If they ran together with Obama as president and Hillary as his running-mate, man, I think that would be hard to beat.
On the Republican side, I do think McCain is a respectable person, I just do not trust the crazy GOP bastards.
In the words of the immortal white rapper, Vanilla Ice, "Go white boy, go white boy, go!".
This Sam McGuffie guy is from Texas and this is his highlight tape. Folks, he is a monster. The tape isn't as good as Noel Devine's but it's close.
I watched it and I was amazed. Even more amazing is that he is white. This is not a racist comment. You just don't see white guys toting the rock for big schools like Michigan (which is where he's headed).
It all started around Christmas time. My mother-in-law got me a $50 gift card to Amazon.com. I was like, "Hmm...well I'll just get me a couple of books, read them, and be done with it."
Wrong. The one thing about me is that if I start reading a book, I get terrible. I have to just keep reading and reading until I'm done. A 400-page book in two days is nothing. Well, I got onto Amazon and found out you can get books dirt cheap if you buy them from wholesalers, so I loaded up. My passion: rock biographies (my dream would be to be a rock biographer).
Then, just as I was finishing the books up around the second week of January, Jaime and I got another Amazon gift card from our credit card company. So the whole damn process started over again.
Here are the books that stole away my time and a brief thought on each.
1. Whores: An Oral Biography of Perry Farrell and Jane's Addiction by Brenden Muller.
Fantastic book about a band that I think is one of the greatest bands of the era. The thing that makes the reading so kick-ass is because it's from members of the group, their friends, and other people that were on the scene in LA back in the Jane's Addiction heyday.
2. Don't Try This at Home by Dave Navarro and Neil Strauss
I like this one, but out of all of the books I read, this is probably the least favorite out of all of them. Navarro is an egotistical little bastard but when you can play guitar like he can, I guess he has the right. Basically just a journal-like look into a year of his life. Some cool-ass photos (including one of a strung-out ass Anthony Kiedis).
3. Heavier than Heaven: A Biography of Kurt Cobain by Charles R. Cross
I love this book. It's one of the best rock biographies of that I have ever read and I have read a ton of them. It is a fast read and it gives great insight into the scene back then of the last important rock band. Oh, Johnson (if you're reading this), Cobain is not overrated like I saw that you wrote you bastard!!!!!
4. Scar Tissue by Anthony Kiedis and Larry Sloman
This one isn't bad. The only thing that drove me crazy is how Kiedis would always talk about all of these women that he'd met and talk about how they were "the one" then the asshole would end up cheating on them, relapse on heroin, then find another chick. Okay Anthony, we get it, you are a rock star and you can pull some ass. And you did a buttload of drugs.
5. The Dirt: Confessions of the World's Most Notorious Rock Band by Motley Crue
All I have to say is this is a bad mofo. These guys were legends of being party animals. Buy it, it will make any drinking or other problem that you have seem pretty damn minor.
6. Slash by Slash and Anthony Bozza
A hell of a cool guy, that Slash was. He is one of my favorite guitarists of all time who was in my favorite band of all time. I like this book because Slash just presents his point of view on how things went and doesn't go after Axl too much. He just tells the stories and let's you form an opinion. Definitely worth the money.
7. W.A.R.: The Unauthorized Biography of W. Axl Rose by Mick Wall
LIke I said on the Slash review, GNR is one of my favorites of all-time and Axl is maybe the most charismatic frontmen ever, second only to my man Jim Morrison. WAR does a good job trying to explain why Axl is the way he is (which is a colossal asshole). Oh, and Mick Wall, the author, was also immortalized in the song "Get in the Ring" where Axl threatens to kick his ass. That is covered in the book as well.
Well folks, there it is. Seven books, a little under two months. I even took a two-week break because I figured it was "becoming a problem".
You will all be glad to know that I have no more Amazon gift cards, I still managed to do some household duties during this binge, and that my family still loves me.
Been a long time since I posted...new job, relapse into a mad wicked reading addiction (I'll get into that one later), and just plain ass laziness have kept me off of the site.
But now I'm back mofos and I'm going to rededicate myself to being the best smartass I can be!!!! Hope some of you still check this out, hope more of you will post too. Makes it more interesting!
Let the games resume.
